I Wish I Could Go to Daycare

      Comments Off on I Wish I Could Go to Daycare

I have come to the conclusion that daycare

is way, way, way, way, WAY more fun than work.

I go to work. A lot. Well, I guess a normal amount like everybody else but it FEELS like a lot. And when I go to work, Pineapple goes to daycare. A very expensive daycare. And before you get started, yes I know there are cheaper daycares out there and yes I realize that she would probably be just fine at those…but I’m not sure I would. And if you’re a mom, you probably get exactly what I’m saying. If you’re not a mom, just imagine that someone told you that you should consider depositing the 40 bazillion dollars you just won in the lottery in a bank called “We Kind of Care About Your Money but We Care a Wee Bit More About Our Smoke/Coffee/TV Break” and you’ll get my drift.

But I digress…

I go to work and most days I sit at my desk. I’m starting to suspect that I might be developing some sort of debilitating butt rash as a result of all the sitting. Sometimes I get to walk around the room a little bit and sometimes I get to drive or fly places – but more often than not, my butt is in an “ergonomic-my-ass” chair gettin’ all lazy and rashy.

Pineapple on the other hand has a FULL calendar of fun and engaging activities. Like what? you ask…

On Mondays, Pineapple has “Show and Tell Toy Day” and all the kids bring in a special toy that they present to their friends. Then they all take turns sharing each others’ toys and learning about what they are. It’s like getting a peek at someone’s personality. Can you imagine what folks would bring to work in the same situation? Most likely something dull and non-revealing but you know that there’d be that ONE person that would bring the totally inappropriate thing. And that would RULE.

Fridays are “Bring a Book Day” and they all bring a book which is read to the group during book time. *sigh* I NEVER get book time at work! And I looooove books!

Then they have all these random activities; like firedrills (which DH says had better consist of each of Pineapple’s teachers taking turns practicing running from the house holding our kidlet) and “wear your clothes backwards” day and field trips to pumpkin patches (OK – I got to go to that one but I think work should have regular field trips as well).

And they have art projects – fingerpainting, and using scissors and glue (which I RARELY get to use unless I’m cutting out a picture of Taylor Lautner from GQ to hang on my cube wall because seriously, who am I kidding?!)

you’re welcome

And they even get…………wait for it……..


I want a friggin’ nap time! They all lie on their nap mats and the teacher plays soothing music. That kid sleeps more than I do and I NEED some sleep! I’m working after all. She’s just playing.

Oh and they have a playground. I totally want a playground. Wouldn’t it be cool if you could turn your cube into a playground area if you wanted….like create a cube tree house and just hang out in it all day?

And they’re always having treats – like cupcakes – or just yummy snacks. I have to eat nuts and cranberries or I’m going to have to be rolled into my 20 year highschool reunion using one of those elaborate pulley systems the egyptians created for moving those big slabs of rock in the pyramids (which, FYI, is a total lie if you watch the History Channel – it’s soooo obvious aliens built those things as energy recepticles…duh).

Also, I’m just gonna say it: I really like to color. And you don’t really get to color that often as an adult. I loooooove to color. It’s so much fun staying in the lines and using the different colors to make the picture perfect or funky – or both. As it is, I have to beg Pineapple to color in the evenings with me and even then she gets all mad if I use the coloring book she wants (which is, inevitably, the one I’m using) and then she messes up my pictures with scribbles. I mean, I had that Clifford picture just right! All the chickens were this beautiful creamy yellow color…now they have blue lines.

I don’t get to do any of those things at work.

But I do get to drink margaritas occasionally. And I do get to stay up as late as I want. I can go to R-rated movies (but if we’re being honest, we all know my tastes run more PG 13) if I want to. I get to drink coffee and write blogs.


(I’d still rather color. *pout*)

XOXO – Rachael